Mario Kart comes out tonight. Prolly not gonna get it, tho (broke).

Hearing: Groove Salad: a nicely chilled plate of ambient beats and grooves. [SomaFM]
via FoxyTunes



Kind of tired right now. Staying up too late. ZZZzzzzzzzzzzz.......
Nite all.

Hearing: Gary Jules - Mad World
via FoxyTunes


end of the story

Been a while, so I made something.


and i deal with this EVERY DAY

So some psychopath comes into the store and starts talking at me while I'm stocking video games. After such lovely tidbits about how the government is putting cameras in every electronic device made after 2007 (no, seriously) and a compelling argument on the conversion of every state into a prison ("And that's why America is going to be the first to fall, because the government has too much control"), I naturally decided to turn on the recorder in my cell phone and hide it in my pocket.
Here is that wonderful conversation. (well, about half of it.)
This section includes topics such as TMNT for the 360, tiny cameras in your Atari, and the Oppressive Widescreen Agenda.
I'm really kind of sad that I didn't start recording earlier, but I was a little bit dumbfounded that people can actually think things like this without their heads exploding from all of the compressed studipity. After he was talking about Metal Gear 4, I suggested that he stay away from it in order to avoid the government seeing how good he was at it and drafting him as a result.
Psychopath: "Oh, they won't do that. I've already been in the army, but they kicked me out because they thought I was crazy."
Me: "...Really."
Psychopath: "Yeah, whenever someone gets behind me with a gun, I just can't trust them. You can't really trust anybody in the army, because they'll turn on you in a minute. So, I decide that it's better to take them out first."
Me: "... Yeah, you gotta watch out for that team-killing."


So i just got an entire month's worth of COMPLETELY FUCKING NUTS. Will post details tonight.

This mobile text message is brought to you by AT&T


why i love bored people

http://view.break.com/487616 - Watch more free videos

Hehehe. The guard at the end is just awesome.


on being strong

Have you ever had one of those moments in your life, when other people around you are scared, or worried, or in some other way distressed? And you have to be the one who puts aside emotions, and makes decisions, and is reassuring? Even when you are also losing it?

I had a moment like that today.

It was really weird. I've always been one to ignore reality in order to make things seem easier. It's kind of a lazy person's self-preservation technique. Things don't ever get too bad because I don't think about them. True, it may not be the best way to deal with stress, but for me it's seemed to generally work out over the course of my life. However, a result of this is that I have a tendency to become calloused in certain situations in which I should otherwise be emotionally open. It's kind of a double-edged sword, I guess.
But it's a double-edged sword that is necessary, because I am also a compulsive worrier. I know how odd that must seem, right? I put forward a front of one of the most laid-back people in existence, but really even little things eat me up inside. So, I try to ignore problems before I can start thinking about them and therefore consume me. It usually works out okay.
But there are times in our lives in which something truly important comes into jeopardy, and even people like me get worried. Really worried. And it's times like these in which I have to be strong for the people I usually draw my strength from. It seems odd to me, but I sort of shut off my emotions and become hyper-logical. I don't so much feel things as think about feeling things. It's like I experience life through a veil; that I'm not really there. Very similar to when I'm ignoring too much. But the main difference between ignoring emotions and setting emotions aside is that with the latter there is a sense of urgency, that I still have all of the other thoughts screaming inside my head.

And honestly, the best and worst part of it is the resolution to the crisis.

Because after all of that pent-up stress, panic, fear, and general chaos happening in my head, the release of it when I cease to be logical and start listening to myself again is almost painful. I think this is why most people cry after something traumatic, even though I don't. Being so concerned about what might have happened, and replaying a scenario turned out differently in your head, and feeling every emotion that you would have felt had that happened... it's just quite a bit to deal with at once.

Still, I am glad today happened. Because I got to see something that I never could have prepared myself for. And that is a big thing, because I am good at preparing myself for things.



So my software is broked. Need to fix that, and a lot of other things on my system. And in general.
Here is something I scribbled up.

Yes, I know it doesn't really make sense, or look good. But I felt like it anyways.

Needs filter power!

Currently gaming:
Deuce Ex: The Conspiracy for PS2.
Opening levels
Yup. Because it's not that great of a game.
Thoughts so far:
Interesting story, wish it wasn't so slow.

Hearing: Ziwtra - Secret of Mana Stomp the Summer Sky OC ReMix
via FoxyTunes


i wants one

So this is really, really, ridiculously cool. I want to get one and make my own action figures. Or cat toys. Or dishes. Or anything, really.
It's basically pure awesome.
On a side note, Brave Story is really, really awesome (thanks, Nathan) and both the book and anime are great. You should come over and watch it sometime.
I figured out a way to stream movies from my desktop through my laptop to the TV. It's a bit cumbersome, though, and I kind of wish I had a PS3 to stream through my PSP, which would be about 100 times easier to set up. Although, I've been wondering if there's a way to leave the PS3 out of the loop, since the PSP directly connects with my router anyway... Gonna have to look that one up.
Getting stuff done, feeling better about life for it. If I can find my pen I'll start sketching stuff again. Need to fix some software issues, though. Photoshop never quite worked right, so it needs some tweaking.
I should stop bumming around so much on my off days. But I have this nagging need to finish all the old games I never completed. You know what the last thing I played through to the end was? dot hack. The first one. Yeah, that's sad. Whelp, one down, like 60 more to go!